How to (maybe) get baby down for a nap in 14 easy steps

I love them so very much

BUT

When only the baby is home, and he takes a nap, it is exciting.

1) Wait until your parents call and offer to take the toddler and preschooler to their house for a fun visit. Yay! Don't get too excited yet though.

2) Play with the baby, nurse him, change his diaper, and change his outfit. This is all getting done multiple times a day, of course, but it must be done all at once right before a nap attempt, if you want a nap of any decent length.

3) Try to nurse the baby to sleep. He will probably see right through this plan and refuse to close his eyes. It's worth a try though, and if it fails will at least serve to have him topped off and full.

4) Let him play for a little while in the floor until he starts to eat fuzz and crumbs that would have been swept up except you have not had time because, for one, the baby has not taken a nap.

5) Nurse him again. He is still not falling for that, I bet.

6) Place baby in the Jumperoo to play for a few minutes while you work on getting the house clean for the weekend.

7) Look over and see that your baby has fallen asleep standing up! What luck!

8) Carefully lift baby out of the Jumperoo. When his foot gets caught and he whimpers, cuddle him and walk around until he falls back asleep.

9) You could play it safe and just sit down, but there is a lot to do around the house. While still cradling the baby in one arm, use the other arm to prepare a nap spot on the love seat. Slyly place baby on this spot, on his side with his back against the back of the love seat. Maybe he won't even notice you aren't holding him anymore.

10) Well, crap. He starts to wake up and is giving you that look--"Mama! Did I nod off again? What's going on?! Noooo, pick me back up!" Don't pick him back up. You can still salvage this nap with a boob. Contort yourself so that you can nurse the baby without having to move him out of the nap position.

11) It will take a few minutes to get him back to sleep. In your twisted position, your arm will be asleep before he is--but it'll be worth it! Don't screw this up! First, let his eyes close. While still nursing, tuck baby in with a blanket. Now, wait until he's no longer nursing. Give it an extra minute or two just to be sure. You may now safely remove your booboo, but do not move. Yet.

12) If he doesn't start crying or trying to figure out in his sleep where the milkies went, you may back away slooooowly. If at any point the baby stirs, go back to #10. If not, sit up slooooowly.

13) Stand up and tiptoe away to do your silent happy dance. Well done, Mama! Now go enjoy some solo housecleaning and ice cream-eating. Don't forget to keep an eye on baby, though. He could wake up and try to roll, and you'll need to be right there to pick him up.

14) After 45 minutes or so of sweet naptime victory, you will be feeling awesome and recharged, and baby will be about ready to wake up. It is entirely possible, though, to pick him up promptly and nurse him for a little extra sleepytime. You can't get any work done during this time, but you can blog!

If you're really lucky, baby will sleep all the way until Daddy comes home. Happy Weekend!